Several days ago when I was walking to the mailbox, I noticed that I must have run over the grasshopper that has been tormenting me. He was partially smashed with many ants doing a celebratory dance around his carcass. I know we had our differences, but I wouldn’t have killed him intentionally. I never thought of spraying him with poison or stepping on him when I caught him vandalizing the marigolds. I just shooed him away. The worst part is I wasn’t sure if he was completely dead. I thought I saw one of his antennas move. I’m hoping it was just the wind. When JazzHands ran over a lizard in my driveway a few months ago she crushed his entire head, leaving no doubt. She’s very efficient that way.
Tonight as I left the garbage by the curb I noticed three grasshoppers in the jasmine. Big ones! I hope they haven’t come to avenge the death of their friend. I deadbolted the door when I came in. As my brother once said, "I'm not going to take any precautions; I want to be careful." Yes, he actually said that.
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Eee! Instead of JazzHands, it sounds like I could be called KillingHands. . . . . ummm, no, it doesn't have the same ring to it.
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